May 10, 2012

Girls and our insecurities

It's hard to be a girl sometimes. We always have to deal with our insecurities about our appearances.
I've never heard a guy telling his guy friends,"Hey, don't dress up yea. Cos I'm not in my best shirt today."
Most of them just don't care about what their counterparts are wearing or how they look.
Whereas girls have the tendency to compete with their counterparts on who looks best.

I was supposed to meet up with some girlfriends a few weeks ago. I was still at home when they called me and said,"Hey, don't wear make up and don't dress up. We're not wearing make up and we look ugly."

They are not the first one who said that to me. My other girlfriends have told me the same thing too before.
This made me think, hey, I've never told my friends what to wear and what not to wear thankfully. No matter how ugly and dressed down I am, I dont really care what my friends are wearing.
I am very short and I can't wear high heels either. My friends are all taller than me and they love to wear high heels. But what do I care? It doesn't make any difference either, with or without high heels, they're all taller than me. Ok, maybe this is desperation talking hehe.

But sometimes I feel sad for my friends.. Don't they feel tired, comparing themselves to other girls? Striving to be the prettiest and the best dressed all the time?

Recently I was surprised how some pretty girls can be the most insecure ones.
I went to a pool party with a cute girlfriend. She asked me a few weeks ago to bring her a pair of bikini, and I did. I told her, let's jump to the pool. She refused and told me that she didn't want to wear her bikini. Why? Because she got a ugly bruise on her leg, as she just fell down the stairs a few days ago.

I told her,"It's ok. It's dark, and no one will notice anyway. I have surgery scars all over my body. If anyone notices your bruise, they will have noticed my scars first. I'll cover up for you, no worries."
Still she refused. And by the end of the party, she stayed dry and sulked in the corner.
Me? I was dancing the night away at the poolside in my bikini, surrounded by awesome people, having the time of our lives :)
Scars, bruises? Who cares? I don't. And apparently others don't either.

Isn't it a pity that a pretty girl could ruin her own fun worrying about small stuffs, being insecure and afraid of what other people would think, and forgetting the fact that she has a lot more to focus on than her bruise.
In the end, it is indeed a matter of how you see, accept and be comfortable in your own skin that counts.


I am now officially an Iphone convert

As a gadget-illiterate person, I have to admit I'm now an Iphone convert.
I realized how handy this dear thing was when I was traveling solo through Vietnam.
Photos? One click. The photo quality is very nice as well. Though I won't say this at night.
No one there to take a photo for you? Front camera feature!
Need to kill time at the airport or bus station? built in Ipod
No pen and travel diary? Covered
WiFi available? Yes! I'm saved.
Money is running out and need to call dad :D ? Hey, it's still an iPHONE

And where's my Blackberry? Buried in the bottom of my backpack. 

Iphone.. I'm in love.. And in Steve Jobs I do trust.

April 12, 2012

Memperdagangkan tuhan?

Mari Jujur Membuka Hati

Seseorang datang padaku
Menawarkan tuhan menggebu-gebu
Aku terdiam dalam bisu
Hatiku pun sedih dan kelu

Mengapa Tuhan ditawar-tawarkan?
Seolah-olah barang dagangan?
Mengapa Dia dipromosikan?
Seakan mengejar target setoran?!

Mengapa wajah keagamaan kita?
Dipenuhi tawaran kavling surga?
Dengan bonus beraneka rupa?
Kekayaan dan pengampunan dosa?!

Jika agama diwarnai transaksi
Bonus insentif dan gratifikasi
Apalagi yang bisa dipercayai?
Jika semuanya serba materi?!

Saatnya kita mengoreksi diri
Mengembalikan agama ke ranah pribadi
Tak usah saling berpromosi
Dan merasa paling benar sendiri

Lihatlah fakta di sekitar kita
Rumah ibadat ada dimana-mana
Namun korupsi asyik merajalela
Moralitas menjadi barang langka

Mengapa sampai terjadi anomali?
Kehidupan beragama masa kini
Tentu ada yang perlu dibenahi
Marilah jujur membuka hati

Surabaya, 12 April 2012
Oleh : Ws. Budi S.T.

April 9, 2012

Reality of fear

You're not scared of the dark,
you're scared of what's in it.

You're not afraid of heights,
you're afraid of falling.

You're not afraid of the people around you,
you're afraid of rejection.

You're not afraid to love,
you're just afraid of not being loved back.

You're not afraid to let go,
you're afraid to accept the reality that it's gone.

You're not afraid to try again,
you're afraid of getting hurt for the same reason.

March 19, 2012

Date a girl who travels

Date a girl who travels. Date a girl who would rather save up for out of town trips or day trips than buy new shoes or clothes. She may not look like a fashion plate, but behind that tanned and freckled face from all the days out in the sun, lies a mind that can take you places and an open heart that will take you for what you are, not for what you can be.

Date a girl who travels. You’ll recognize her by the backpack she always carries. She won’t be carrying a dainty handbag; where will she put her travel journal, her pens, and the LED flashlight that’s always attached to her bag’s zipper? In a small purse, how can she bring the small coil of travel string, the wet tissues, the box of cracker, and the bottle of water she’s always ready with, just in case something happens and she can’t go home yet?

Yes, a girl who travels knows that anytime, anything can happen and she just has to be prepared with it. Nothing takes her by surprise; she takes everything with equanimity, knowing that such things are always a part of life. She’s reliable and dependable, traits that she’s learned while on the road.

You’ll also recognize a girl who travels by the fact that she’s always amazed at the world around her, no matter if she’s in her home town or in a place that’s totally new. She sees beauty all around her, not just the ones featured in travel guides or shown in postcards. A girl who travels has developed a deeper appreciation for life. She won’t judge you, or pressure you to do things you don’t want to do. She knows too much about the importance of identity and self-efficacy, and she will appreciate all the more if you won’t pretend to be who you’re not.

You can lie to a girl who travels and make mistakes, and you can also be as idiosyncratic as you can be. Trust me, she has seen so much worse in her travels, and knows firsthand the vagaries of human nature.

Date a girl who travels, because when you’re with her, you’ll realize that even though she’s napped at a temple in Angkor Wat, went boating down the Mekong Delta, ran by the streets of Saigon, or went skinny-dipping in the caves in the Philippines, she still retains that humility that is the mark of a real traveler. She knows she’s been to a lot of places, but she’s humbled by the fact that the world is still a big place and she’s only seen a small part of it. Seeing this in her can make you feel all right with yourself too; there’s no need for you to do more, to be more. What you are is enough.

When you meet a girl who travels, ask her where she’s been and what she’s going to do next. She will appreciate your interest, and if you’re lucky, she may even invite you to join her. When she does, do. Nothing bonds people better than traveling. On your trips, you will both see each other’s best and worst characteristics, and you can then decide whether she’s worth fighting for.

It’s easy enough to date a girl who travels. She won’t want expensive gifts; you can buy her (or both of you) cheap tickets to Thailand for the weekend, and she’ll be more than happy to take you to the longest wooden bridge in the country. You don’t even have to go overseas; you can take her out on day trips, caving or hiking, or treat her to a full body massage.

You can also buy her the little things that she keeps forgetting to buy for herself; that carabiner that will attach her backpack to her seat so that she will feel easier about sleeping on her bus trip, or a backpack cover, a small alarm clock, a money belt, or maybe another sarong that will replace the one she lost in China.

She won’t mind if you get lost on your way to a date. She knows that oftentimes, the journey is more important than the destination. She will help you see the lighter side of things. She’ll walk along with you, not behind you, pointing out the interesting bits of things you’ll see on the way. Before long, you’ll realize that yes, the journey has been more memorable than the destination that you’ve planned to take her to.

Is a girl who travels worth it? Yes, she is. So when you find her, keep her. Don’t lose her with your insecurities and doubts. Because when she says she loves you, she really does. After all, she’s seen so many things, met so many people, and if she had chosen you, better grab that opportunity and thank the gods that you were lucky enough she’s chosen you and not that bloke she met while watching the sun rise in Angkor Wat, or while whitewater rafting in the Padas Gorge in Sabah.

If she says she loves you, she must have seen something in you, something that can always call her back from her travels, something that can anchor her to the world in the way that she wants to after weeks and months of being on the road.

Date a girl who travels. Make her feel safe, warm, and secure. Make her believe that no matter where she goes, and however long she’s gone, you’ll always be there for her, the one that she can call home.

*Yaay to wanderlust!!

http://www.solitarywanderer.com/2012/02/date-a-girl-who-travels/