November 2, 2009

TALE OF 2 COWS



SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows
You give 1 cow for your neighbor.

COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows
The state take over both cows and give you 2 cans of milk.

FASCISM
You have 2 cows
The state take over both cows and sell the milk to you.

NAZISM
You have 2 cows
The state take over both cows and shot you.

BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2 cows ,
The state take over both cows, shot one, get the milk from the other and throw it away.

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have 2 female cows
you sell one and buy one male cow, the number of your cattle grows, and the economy grows.

SURREALISM
You have 2 cows
The government asked you to take harmonica course.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have 2 cows .
You sell one, and force the other one to produce milk as much as 4 cows.
Then, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow died.

THE ANDERSEN MODEL
You have 2 cows .
You minced them both.

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have 2 cows
You go in the street, gather the mass, blockade the street, because you want 3 cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have 2 cows .
You redesigned them so they can produce 20 times as much milk.
Then you create a cartoon profile of smart cow named "Cowkimon" and sell it to the world.

A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have 2 cows
You redesigned them so they can live for more than 100 years, eat only once a month, and they can milk each others.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have 2 cows, but you don’t know where they are.
So you decide to go out for lunch.

A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have 2 cows
You count them and dream what if you have 5 cows .
You count them again and dream what if you have 42 cows .
You count them again and realized that you only have 2 cows.
You stop counting and open a bottle of Vodka.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them are yours.
Then you charge administrative fee to the owners for keeping there.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have 2 cows .
You have 300 pepole to milk those cows.
You state that there is no unemployment, and the production rate is high.
You arrest reporters who report the truth.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have 2 cows
You worship them.

BRITISH CORPORATION
You have 2 cows
Both are mad cows.

IRAQ CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have many cows
You tell them you don’t have them.
No one believes you, so they bomb and invade your country.
You still have no cows, at least now you are part of democracy.

NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have 2 cows
The left cow seems quite attractive.

AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have 2 cows .
The business seems good.
You close the office and find beer to celebrate it.

INDONESIAN CORPORATION
You have 2 stolen cows
Take a bank loan of 4 cows, then sell the 4 loan cows, and put the 2 stolen cows under your childrens name.
Tell the bank that you can not pay them, unless they finance you a milk factory.
Take the money and go to Singapore

MALAYSIAN CORPORATION
You have 2 cows
Both are stolen from Indonesia.

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